$ If your husband buys a restaurant, you will be a waitress

$ Don't make a tenant mad who lives near you

$ Buy from mad people

$ Today's rip off is tomorrow's good deal

$ Buy a jail

$ One good investment is worth a lifetime of toil

$ Buy eroding oceanfront before the bulkhead is built

$ Marry a woman with a house

$ Sell in one day

$ Buy from rich people because they don't need the money

$ Be the only bidder

$ This is your father's real estate book

$ Watch your builder

$ Pay your appraiser's bill because he might be elected tax assessor

$ Trade your car for a lot

$ Don't buy a security system the day after the break in

$ Negotiate with a heart

$ Don't make the seller mad

$ Trade your lot for debt relief

$ Buy on the water

$ Buy mismanaged rental houses

$ Rental property is a great retirement supplement

$ Buy only when you get a good price on good terms

$ Buy a mobile home

$ Go to open houses

$ Buy next to something important

$ Get a will

$ Make a lake

$ Buy a subdivision

$ Buy a VA repossession

$ Rent from a friend to get your foot in the door